danger/u/
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I tortured apples

| You may think this is a shitpost and laugh hard about this, and I'd be glad. But what I now am going to inform you about, is a total truth, and happened less then 10 minutes ago.


| So, I'm in the countryside house RN, and it's november, right? There are several apple trees around, and they give A LOT of fucking apples. I've been eating them and giving away to everyone since august or smth. My grandparrents collected all they could and now keep apples in boxes. However it all is not important. What is important is that there's a lot of apples still laying on the ground. Most of them are rotten, some are not.


| I love sex.


| >>800607 I love you.


| So! I've got this one thing since I was a kid and visited this place. Sometimes I just go on a fucking frenzy, "KILLING" and "TORTURING" apples. I fucking THROW THEM on the bricks watching them SPLATTER over the area, I stab them with nails many-many times, I cut them with knives, I simply hit them fucking hard, I throw rocks at them and so on.


| While I do so, I become fucking insane. I laugh, I do faces, I fucking roar, I scratch my teeth while KILLING apples. I feel myself like a fucking maniac. Like a fucking maniac. Like a fucking maniac, basically.


| And this is what happened now as well. I commited a fucking GENOCYDE of apples. I became their DOOM. Laughing and torturing everything I could find. I was so cynical, I was so inhumanely cruel and brutal to these apples, that my face had a horrible grin all the time. I blew apples apart and throwed the apple "guts" at other apples, saying something like "Do you like the intestants of your fellow apples? Kiss this shit, yeah, KISS IT, FUCKER!!!"


| Then I've noticed there is an apple still on the tree. It was clear this was the Apple King, so I commenced the operation to overthrow his government. I declared, that I will spare life of an apple, which would be able to bring the king down the ground, and became throwing them at him. None were succesfull, so I brutally executed them at once. After a few minutes I found a wooden plank, and soon the king was overthtown!


| For 10 or so minutes I brutally tortured and humiliated that fucker, showing all this to his "nation". Along this I've killed some of his lieges and stuffed his guts with their flesh. I won't describe all the torturing I've done, so I'll say it was really fucking disgraseful for the king and his apples. I executed the fucker and splattered all the tiny pieces of him over the ground.


| After that I've executed some apples and marked the remaining ones with a knife, so they'd remember this nightmare till their soon death of rotting. Also I've totally genocyded a few apples which layed down in a little house nearby. After few more minutes disgracing the apples, I've left home.


| Oof, that's about it. I'm 20 years old, and I despise violence IRL. But oh My God, what a fucking monster I was to these apples. And I probably will do this some time in the future. Jesus.


| I told you this already, but I really like your writing style.
You've got nice accents going on in this one too~
I look forward to your future works.


| >>800621 I really appreciate you liked it, however I find it kinda weird...


| >>800622 It's a departure from what you usually do, and the subject matter doesn't trouble me at all~
Come on now, it's just apples, they would've gone to waste anyhow. It's like one of those rage rooms where you smash broken electronics with like a baseball bat?
Was I supposed to be shocked?


| >>800623 nah, I just wanted to let off the steam and to speak off, not to shock anyone. Also... what do I... usually do, you were saying? What exact;y did you mean by that


| >>800624 c:


| >>800626 no really, WYDM 'what you usually do'


| This story reminds me of the anon who once smooshed several M&M's together and mailed the "survivor" to the M&M company for breeding purposes. I love this shit.


| >>800631 ahahaha lol, what? Was it posted here? Sounds fucking hillarious


| >>800639

No, it's an ancient thread from 4chan.


| >>800641 lol, legendary


| >>800641
It surfaced on bash.org way before 4chan even existed.


| Cute thread.


| You sicko


| >>800620 your bloodlust for the rest of the year must be sated by the apple torturing ritual. I dread the day when apples fall no more upon your fields


| >>800679 if only it was the last bloodlust for the year...


| Return to monke, smash fruit, acceptable recreational activity, little weird, at least you're not torturing animals.

Can't wait for part 2 where you separate the red/green apples and create a race war.


| >>800685 based


| >>800685 OP next time please run some science experiments on them and determine whether red or green is the apple master race


| God bless your autism


| >>800685 >>800692 Oh boy! I can't wait for Apple Auschwitz!

>>800605 Also this is the funniest thing I have seen all week thanks! Hopefully you can have more "fun" with the apples in the future.


| Can i being bad apple... And would you punish me? "^^


| >>800742
>hello, I need one pressurized container of ethylene, please
>sure thing, what are you making?
>*sweats*


| Behold! A truly cute evil. OP is cute evil.


| >>800607 OP loves torturing apples, and you love sex... with apples, right?..


| When I was a kid we'd throw the pears from my neighbors pear tree at the wire fence and watch them get stuck then try to hit the stuck pears with another pear to hit them through....


| >>800895 oh I got hard...


| When I imagined that juice streaming from fallen pears and pear "flesh" being torn by the fence, I got unironically satisfied


| Also did you guys know my favourite mobile game was Fruit Ninja for a long period of time? Obviously, now I think about it. Well, the more you know!


| >>0dbb97 i much preferred the platonic version of evil cute fruit murderer

Op fucks melons, you can't change my mind


| good job for spreading apple seeds everywhere and fertilizing the ground


| >>800910 mine too, i did unlock every blade xd does it mean that i'm not sub anymore but switch?


| >>800965 the game was better at 2012-2015

Total number of posts: 43, last modified on: Thu Jan 1 00:00:00 1636290905

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