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"Friendship" is fucking worthless
| That's the gist of it. Some people can forge these connections while other people simply can't and will end up forever alone.
Lacking empathy is a big part of it, so is having a negative outlook/attitude.
| The most important attachment we have to build through life is the one which involves ourselves. Before we try connecting with other people, we first have to accept ourselves for all our flaws, insecurities, and failures.
We have to learn to love the person we see in the mirror every day.
Most people fail at connecting because they think that they are broken and damaged beyond repair. They believe they don’t deserve people in their lives because they are “this” and “that”.
| Here are simple ways to improve your connection with yourself:
Notice your feelings and why you feel sad, angry, or happy when in a situation.
Make time for solo activities that you enjoy once in a while.
Be more compassionate – with yourself. Forgive and forget mistakes.
Keep a journal and keep track of what’s happening on your life. You’ll be shocked at how much progress you’ve made.
| Sometimes to be able to connect, all we need is a little attitude change. Try to think how you behave with other people, and how they behave when they’re with you. Often times, we see ourselves as the victim. We focus on the negative and fail to see the good things.
If we shift our perspectives and maybe change our interpretations of the situation, we would see how sometimes horrible experiences are not so horrible. That sometimes things were really just an honest mistake.
| Are you really listening to your friends when they talk to you? Or are you formulating your response as they speak?
Listening involves understanding the feelings of the person you’re talking to. It’s how you relate with the person. Everyone likes to be listened to; we all want someone to listen to our woes and joyful moments from time to time.
| Listening is one way of forming connection and deep relationships. Great conversations allow both parties open dialogue, exchange of ideas, and respect.
When you have mindful and better conversations with someone, you build trust that lasts for years to come.
These simple attitude changes can create ripples of big changes that lead to transformation. Soon you’ll know how to connect with people – and have truer longer and lasting relationships.
| Thank you for taking the time to write that anon! It made me feel a lot better.
I'll take your advice for sure. I'm keeping this advice for the long run.
I definitely have to stop treating myself like this and be compassionate towards myself. However while I try to listen to people I often times feel people really don't care about how I feel, which is fine, but what I consider a true friend is someone who stays by your side even you're in dire straits, and it goes both ways too.
| >>813813 Empathy, as you said, I feel is one of the bigger issues when it comes to friends and meeting people.
I feel that, nowadays people are really individualist and too self-centered. For a lot of people life is a movie starring themselves. Everyone else is just a side character. Social media shows that a lot, everything is so superficial and just not genuine, it makes me sick.
People don't like to talk about feelings because it makes them feel uncomfortable...
| >>813813 I wish I could meet more people that I could talk to about our feelings and worries and comfort each other. Sadly, for most people around my age and my area, life revolves around getting drunk, sex and a nice car.
I really gotta find better circles. I enjoy being alone and doing stuff solo. It's just that I'm worried everyone is like this. You made me so happy anon, you've made me realize that that isn't the case and there's people out there who really understand others.
| It's been a couple of times that I've been stabbed in the back by people I thought I could trust and It hurt really bad. That's why I made this thread, today I was thinking about how people like this and I guess I just lost hope. People come and go I guess. And the fact that there are indeed people who don't care about anyone but themselves is a cruel realization but a necessary one. In a way it has made me appreciate people that stay humble, honest and genuine.
| I've felt like this a lot. Especially after losing so many "friends" and just becoming more and more distant with a lot of the ones who remained.
But, I met someone who made me change my mind. Someone who I've known for a little under 2 months now, but is already the closest person I've ever had and an absolutely incredible friend. The reason I'm alive tbh.
Sometimes you find someone, and there is just an instant connection and mutual love and care immediately, but it takes time.
| ed g
| i kind of think the same way op, making you more likely to be a friend, but still unlikely.
| Mucho txt XD
| i will be your fren
| Good answers. Ask yourself if you give a shit about the others too. Also if u hang out with someone, is it really about them or is that person just a placeholder as a "friend"?
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| I don't think I'll ever be able to make a genuine friend ever. It feels like most people I know are just that, acquaintances. People who don't really give a shit about you. And the sad truth is you can count your true friends in one hand and there will still be a lot of fingers remaining. I wish I could start over again.