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The Monkey's Paw Thread
| I want my bunny to know she's cute!
| >>525398
Granted! Your bunny now knows she's cute but she constantly attracts the attention of male bunnys, and they keep screwing like er... rabbits
| I want a cute little anime loli
| >>525426
You get your cute little anime Loli, but you are compelled to take care of it correctly and raise it to be a sane and well-adjusted human being. Not for sexual.
| I want to travel to another world, just like in my isekai mangas!
| I want a boyfren to hug and talk about feelings with
| >>525498 You travel there after getting hit by a truck but don't get returned to life or health. You're crippled until death.
>>525501 Your boyfren is a body pillow.
| i wish to correct the stability of our atmosphere and ozone lay forever
| I only know the monkey's paw from bakemonogatari but does the wearer have to perform the action? For example in the show at night the monkey's paw takes over her and it grants her wish by using her body, I think changing the atmosphere or creating a plague is a bit unbelievable
| >>525649 no, it's supposed to grant the wish, but, by granting it, cause other problems, or fulfill it through causing other problems. The original story had a guy get 200 pounds, but ended up getting it as compensation for his son's death in the factory.
>>525618 It's made perfectly stable. The gases become layered by density in order to maintain stability and everyone suffocates, while freezing, because it lost all its heat.
| I wish to instantly know how to outwit a monkey paw wish. I am aware that this will likely result in something like: "You get your wish. You now possess this knowledge, yet destroyed human civilisation in the process," but this should still be interesting.
| >>525985 you spend a day trying to figure out the perfect wish after you ask of this knowledge, and you finally have the perfect wish, a regular chicken sandwich with no mayo, but the paw is now missing, and you then realize you had left it in your car as it was driving you mad to think about it, your mother had borrowed your car to go to a party with your father, when they returned you learn that he had tossed it out the window in disgust thinking it was just trash.
| I wish getting fucked in the ass by Satan ꈍ .̮ ꈍ
| >>526078
The monkey paw misunderstands Satan for Santa.
You spend the rest of eternity being fucked in the ass by some gross old man dressed as a Shopping centre Santa Claus
| I wish I knew what to wish for.
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| Rules are simple. Make a wish, and the next poster "grants" your wish.
I wish you a merry christmas.