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Cant commit to a conventional subject of study cause I feel like I'm giving up on life then
| I'm sort of in a similar situation, though it's drawing instead of music for me. I didn't really get a formal education on art nor did I ever expect to make it into a decent job, so I'll just keep it as a hobby while I study Software Engineering.
If you really like it, I don't think studying other stuff will be the end of your musical shenanigans. And you could just get out of the course if your music career becomes more attainable. Or take it up again after graduating.
| I think it's impossible to follow through on things like this unless you have someone giving you support, or if you're like, borderline autistically into the subject at hand.
I think that there's nothing wrong with living as an artist, but it's a tough life without skill and the ability to make business connections. Maybe you can join a group of artists with your same skill level to keep you focussed on practicing. It could be fun even.
| If you're interested in it, and might be good at it, learn what you can. Even if you don't immediately use the knowledge, you never know when it may come in handy towards something random.
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| There is this subject I think I might be good at AND Im kinda interested in (system localization)... I start to feel depressed everytime I think about signing in for real though. I have a thing for art and im especially interessted in music. writing, playing & singing means a lot to me but guess im not good enough to work with it seriously