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Depression thread
| Is any mentalnillness welcome ?
| I feel like world hates me and hate it back. Thinking bout death or mental asylum. But that's all cool. Society just doesn't work like it's ideally supposed to and the hole in your soul you got born with gets torn wider and wider until it's too late to sew it back and you become the creepy miserable excuse for a human being. Life's a death trap.
| I'm gonna be like Madeline and go hurling myself at spikes on top of an obscure Canadian mountain. That's the way to cure depression!
| >>298503 Life is though and unfair op, I get it, so don't be afraid to get some help, everyone needs it once in a while, I'm going through the hardest time of my life so far, I tried to find myself again, to find some strengh and value in myself so I can face it all. It helped me so far, I hope it will help you.
| I wish I was dead but am always too scared of how much it will hurt and because of my past failures, so I'm trapped here :^)
| I wish I didn't feel so indifferent about everything.
| >>298564 >>298697 By logic if there night there is day, so if there are stuff that makes you feel shitty about life and all, there is something that will make you feel better.
| i wish i had a cute loli to squeeze
| Been in a mire all day. Not too long ago I had a sudden serious bout of guilt that had me desperately wishing to the point of begging that someone would torture, rape, abuse, and otherwise violate me to the point of death because that was just what I deserved. It was... bad. I'm still recovering, and I'm terrified it'll happen again, except some part of me still thinks it felt *right* to be in that much pain...
| If you really wanted to die , you would already be dead . Killing yourself is the easiest thing to do once you truly want to commit suicide. The fact that you are here talking about you desire to end your life means that you still have at least a little bit of hope . So cling to it and dont let it go ! It's not going to be simple and things won't necessarily work out for you , this is just bs said by naive and hypocritical people.
| In the end if you want to be happy , you have to do it yourself. Your life is your own , your sadness, you despair , your joy , your happiness, all of that depends on your ability to keep trying to do what you want. Yes , life is shit . Yes , your life is not going to get better if you don't change it yourself .
| Wrong thread ...
| >>299630
Suicide is NOT the easiest thing to do, from what I last heard the vast majority of suicide attempts just end you up in the hospital.
| My depression is so deep its called deepression.
Haha get it.
| Yeah, I have to hang around passionate people to do anything.
If I do some up some motivation it's usually half-assed and I flop at whatever I'm doing, some downward spiral shit.
| Most of my depression stems from the fact that I feel stifled, or held down from truly reaching my potential. Not like there's much, but I would be so much more productive had I gotten more freedom in life. So everyday I feel frustrated, then irritated, then angry, then I breakdown from the stress, then I give up. I'm constantly in the give up phase now, not bothering to restart. I'm not sure even if everything works out on my end that I'd be able to regain my footing. This sucks..
| >>301233 I'm like this as well. I'm a cute-ish young lady and people keep trying to coddle me and I'm terrified that I'll never learn to do anything on my own.
But then I noticed that, hey, there's this whole bunch of stuff I'm better at than anyone else I know bar one or two, and nobody has my exact mix, and how did that even happen? So maybe your abilities, yoo, will show through pretty much as soon as you figure out how to stop worrying. That's easier said than done, of course.
| I'm gonna kms brb
| I'm in a cycle of self-hatred and deprecation followed by a period of feeling "fine" that I can never determine who or what I am and I feel like a pretentious asshole for it. I like I have no real personality and merely morph to suit the surrounding tissue which again proves to me how spineless I am. It's as if whatever made me forced two opposite entities into one.I'm clueless on surviving and I'm too much of a utopist, procrastinating shithead I know I would never fix it.
| >>302379 I'm like you, too. Everytime I'm with people, I morph myself to fit in with rest. When I'm alone though, I can be myself, and I usually use the time to reflect on myself and form my own opinions and stance. I'm still pretty fake, but so far I've been getting better.
| I'm never gonna be a real girl
I'm never gonna find a loving domme
| No control over my life. Nothing new. For now.
| Trapped in stasis.
Unable to break the cycle of moving on.
| i want to die and i think dying is the right thing to do
| Suicide is not that bad, You gonna make a lot of people pay for you. So be in debt a shitlot before for extra fun.
| I guess I'll add my woes too.
Haven't had a drop of alcohol for a year, but I still crave it. I lost my dream job because of a medical emergency, recently needed spine surgery. I don't like my current job. My dad died a month ago today. My mom is depressed. My girlfriend moved in with me today and I love her but I'm struggling to find happiness. I work so hard, and do everything I can to stay fit and focused but I still feel dead. Video games are my escape. I can't do this anymore.
| I feel so alone. I haven't really physically talked to anyone in years for longer than a brief encounter. I hardly leave my house save to buy what I need to survive. Hell, I've been living as a NEET for 3 years now, since I graduated high school. My funds are running out though so I'm having to get a job that I start tomorrow. It pays wells but it's a shitty office job that I'd really rather not do.
| I feel like I've wasted my life because I'm too afraid of people and what they'll think of me and the things I want to do. I don't really think I have any potential though, and honestly years of isolation have just left me wanting someone to hold, to talk to, confide in, someone I can cuddle and have interesting talks with under the stars or some stupid shit like that. I think that's all I'd need to feel better, just someone who understands and who I can understand.
| I'm terrified of social interaction though and most of my life before retreating to the comfort of my shitty cheapo apartment is riddled with females informing me thag they find me hideous and boring and weird and that they would rather be with a corpse so rip me I guess. I try not to mind, if no one wants me that's cool, I'm not owed a gf or anything . It still hurts though.
| Therapy, medication, exercise... it works, but you have to choose it. Depression isn't some metaphysical secret existence that only you experience, it's a medical problem. The brain is unhealthy and the symptoms are [see above]. Is this really who you are? It is if you want it to be, and that's the depression feeding back on itself. Patterns of thought, brain chemicals, it's just science. You may be doing therapy/meds for the rest of your life, but you CAN feel better.
| I wasted two legit years of my life doing nothing, also without anyone knowing that I really did nothing. They believe I have a stable life and do stuff but I don't. I have no idea how to get out of this actually.
| I just want out... I just want all this to stop. My birth was a mistake.
| 1/3
I recently had an unfinished projects in university that were due months ago. Procrastination fucks me over like that pretty much every year but this time was the worst, and on top of regular depressive mood I started having these thoughts that if I were expelled, kms would be a viable option, and having these episodes where I suddenly lose will to do anything, random time of day, and just lie down. It scared me, so I started reading on AD pills that don't require recipe
| 2/3
Found out that St John's Wort extracts have some effect, turns out there are pills containing it, and they're not expensive. After a week of using them I could go to sleep without picturing myself failing at everything, and I managed to get all the late assignments done in two weeks. After a month I stoped taking them and the symptoms I had didn't come back
| 3/3
>>305865 This gurl is correct, depression is not something ethereal, it's a chemical imbalance. I tried placebo stuff before but it would only work once and for a week. Pills containing St John's Wort extract or other light anti-depressant may help you but be careful cause it won't cure heavy forms of depression as stated on the 'manual' from the box (idk how this note is called in eng). But if you have something like I had, you could get back on track with these kind of meds.
| Hey, b/o/i/s and g/u/r/l/s having depression, you have to know that I love you really much. If you're feeling down, feel free to ask me for help. https://t.me/ender999
| I have felt numb for the last 10 years, working hard and being responsible to survive. I only feel alive when a date a girl that treats me like shit. Really wish I had feelings for the good girls that care about me. But I always fall asleep around them
| >>306582 Can testify that St John's Wort did almost nothing for me except upset my stomach if I took it before a meal rather than after. It made my heart rate increase, I guess.
| does adderall help?
| >>306660
Well, it is written as side effect, but didn't appear for me despite my weak stomach. Didn't experience heart issues either. I guess one just needs to get lucky with side effects
| >>305826 Maybe you can try to interact with the people at your workplace. Most places are filled with normos, but bothering to make contact with a couple of people can help take your mind off yourself. It can be overwhelming for me, so I usually only interact one on one. It's easier to focus my attention that way. And try not to find romance, because it is only what it is, a romantization of an idea. Just get some friends to drink a couple beers with. IRL friends I mean.
| Nigga depression doesn't exist
Just stop being sad
| >>306554 I get you, but if that is what you want, here is what you do. Write this down... seriously, it is a to-do list.
1: Find a therapist. Usually there are low cost services if that is an issue.
2: Find a psychiatrist. Primary Care Physician or Family Doctor can also prescribe meds, but may not have the experience. An OK place to start though.
3: Go to the Gym. Beat your body to a pulp doing cardio. Trust me, it takes your focus and makes you feel something again.
| >>306676 Adderall is a stimulant, so yes, it will make you feel better, but that is a side effect that disappears with tolerance after a week or two. Clearly not a valid treatment for standard depression or not doing school work because you are depressed etc. I wish I had been in treatment before college, because I feel like I ended up half-assing everything at the last moment, and that made me feel more stressed and got less out of it.
| >>306820 it can be chicken-or-the-egg though, because failing at social interactions could make that gurl feel worse. Being social comes much more easily when you are not depressed (obviously), so I think the isolation is a symptom of the depression, and the depression is magnified by the isolation. As awful and cliché as this sounds, get (professional) help. It is proven, it works, you can DO something, and you can count on them, as opposed to work buddies (some yes, but most no)
| >>306582 I don't have a lot of trust in things like StJW because there will be very little control over consistency of strength etc. Use it as a stepping stone to getting into good treatment, or not at all. Not saying it didn't work for you, but it might not work for everyone and/or exacerbate the situation. I think trying to treat yourself can be an excuse to not take the leap into the therapy/meds world, and if it doesn't work you're no farther ahead, further behind really.
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| /u/ has gone on for probably the longest time without a mention of depression. Coincidentally, this is the longest time I've ever been continually depressed. Fellow mentally ill g/u/rls, lets complain discuss together.