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Anyone believe in marriage?
| It does exist in law and in practice, there are solid historical, cultural and linguistic records of it.
So yeah I believe there is such a thing as ".marriage. Also this does not belong to /new/.
| No. There is no such thing as marriage. It was made up be the goverment to keep people sedated.
| I think it is something made out of pure social pressure.
| Both my younger sisters (23 and 25) are in a long term relationship but didnt marry but instead they signed some kind of agreement without the whole marriage stuff. Basically if you love eachother you dont need some grand party to proof it
| The origin of marriage lies in the transition from an appropriating to a producing economy, which started with the neolithic revolution. In a producing economy individuals create values in quantitative and qualitative much bigger amounts, so that it will survive it's creators. This leads to the question who will inherit the stuff that a person owned when he dies? The whole clan? The Chief? They all will get old and die too once. So in the end it's handed over to next generations...
| ... and of course the ones who own stuff wanted to decide who gets what in particular. But here comes a natural disadvantage of man, as they naturally don't knew who are "their" children. A women naturally knows who's her child, as it physically comes out of her, while a father never knows. That's why marriage was established by man to determine who is the biological successor he probably wants to hand over his property when he dies...
| ...it was a measurement to compensate this advantage from women over man by restricting womens freedom. Over the time it becomes more extreme so that even women themselves become property, owned by the man. Since then marriage is an institution to control, patronize and suppress women. Things just started to change a bit in modern times, as women are more and more allowed to have their own property, which is a pretty painful process, especially for weak men who relied on tradition.
| As usual all the religious stuff about marriage is nothing but meaningless mumbo-jumbo grown over time to justify this practice for the dumb people.
In modern times, the religious aspect disappeared more and it became more a civil, nationalist or even racist reasoned institution. But under the surface (which also is a big business) the harsh materialist reality behind it comes more and more to light, especially there where it is about much money.
| I personally give a fuck about marriage. The only reason for me to do it, is probably because society somehow pushes me to do it. An individual contract without all these rituals and stuff would do it too for me, just for the worst case my partner don't get along anymore with each other there won't be any misunderstanding about what belongs to whom. Children btw should not be treated as property of their parents or society... People should think twice before "making" them.
| as:41673f
I believe in getting tax benefits just for putting up with an occasionally fuckable bff and raising some talking pets, all in the same place so I don't have to drive so much.
| I do not believe in marriage, I think all those husbands and wives and all those wedding cakes and bridal gowns are all faked by the gov'ment.
| marriage is for losers
| I married my wife after her father died. He had terminal lung cancer and started dying during surgery. The doctors put him in a medically induced coma and put him on life support. For weeks they'd try to bring him out of the coma and off life support, but he'd just wake up in fear and agony and have to be put under again. Eventually the got him awake and off life support. He died at the rehab facility within the month.
My wife had lupus. She married me so I could pull the plug.
| I don't believe in romantic love, period. It makes no sense to bind yourself to one person for the rest of your life just so you can have sex once a month and abstain from doing anything else. Why does it have to be one person? Why does it have to be the sex you are attracted to? People woud protect their sexhole/stick with their life, sometimes going against others whom they've known for much longer. It makes no fucking sense.
| >>303666 for me you perspective makes no sense. Don't you ever loved someone you wanted to spend rest of your life with them? Do you have any romantic feelings at all? They after all is what makes us human
| >>303734 Why do you love them? Just because your gut feelings, hormones and chemicals tell you to? I do have them, but usually they're also filled with lust. So I learn to separate love and lust. I see no reason to favor someone more because they physically appeal to me. And even then, why bind yourself to people? Polygamous/amorous relationships make a bit more sense to me, but they are still bound to each other with rules, courtships, their status, etc.
| >>303745 if you simply see lust in it there's not much point. Emotions are also not a satisfactory explanation. Loving someone is a matter of trust and knowing you can let yourself go to that person. Knowing that person is there for you and knowing very well that they make you happy.
A lot of the comments in this thread are disguisting but they give a good reason why all the commies on this board are miserable. You've become too toxic for anyone to like you.
| >>303762 That is the main argument. While I understand that for one to consider marriage, both parties must be comfortable with one another, or at the very least be mutually beneficial. Nevertheless, my point still stands. Why bind yourself to them? Is there none other you trust? You say lust doesn't factor, but you still have to be attracted or find interest in their qualities or characteristics to 'love' them, do you not? So far, I don't believe my question has been answered yet.
| >>303782 yet asexuals exist to break your point. You don't have to bind yourself but your reasons to live decrease significantly. In psychology there's a theory about our purposes to live which are set out by a few main categories we have constructed upon ourselves. Work, friends and family, your love, a hobby etc.
Marxist theory only accounts for work and hobby as the class concept is too vague to fit into anything. Love is an existencial problem for humans.
| >>303785 Before we go on, let me just say I don't have a political agenda saying all this. These are merely my musings. Anyways, asexuals and pansexuals show that lust and love don't go hand in hand. The same can't be said for the others though. And your answer to why we 'love' are because we need a purpose in life, which is fair. But why can't you have lovers the same way you have friends? What makes 'love' so special anyways? That's really all I want to know.
| I'm starting to sound like a reptillian alien cyborg.
| >>303823 if you don't understand it you probably are lol. Seriously though love is a weird and complicated thing, same with marriage. I like to think of it as a proof to both yourself and your love interest that you'd never stop loving her/him and never cheat. Does it make sense? Probably not. Still romanticized love is something that a lot of people strive for and it's really a matter of whether you believe in it or not
| I like to think of marriage as sneaky financial optimisation...
| >>303820 What>>303840 said.
In addition I can use another psychological principle here. Generally we have circles of people generally depending on their social importance towards us. The usual structure of how this circle goes is family > close friends > relative friends > colleagues > strangers
Usually the romantic love mentioned goes towards the family section and sometimes even takes priority over it. It's consenting to giving the most social importance to that person.
| >>303894 if your friends are your "lovers" they wouldn't even have the same meaning to begin with and you would have no way of differentiating any of them. Heck, you'd be confused whether you're in love with a friend or not.
Romantic love is actually a perfect term to explain the specifics here. We can and usually do categorize love depending on the person at hand. Family love, child love, romantic love, friends love etc.
| Not really, you can still live a good life without one.
| >>303896 For me, love is love. There is no such thing as a different kind of love, altough I do believe in varying intensities. Child love sounds more like our parental instincts takig over, not something that builds up over time, like romantic or friendly interest, which I find hard to differentiate.
| >>303894 You've managed to summary the human relationship structure very well.>>303840 And you make a good point too. I would've gone deeper and begun questioning how such a thing had gotten romanticized in the first place, but that would be too much, so this answer is adequate.
| Of course, I still believe marriage doesn't make much sense. This is probably supported by the fact my parents married out of neccessity, and went their own ways with their other lovers. Still, I suppose I can understand the idea of giving yourself over to someone. I must stress for one last time though that I find this behaviour irrational. People are too hung up on this exaggerated concept.
| >>303974 This kind of behavior goes into a more specific logic. It's more studied in neurology but Phenomenology and Ethnomethodology study it. It's the study of human logic and how we structure our logic. I think this goes more into the deeper parts of human logic.
The example of marriage you've described is also fairly common. I live in a country that over 100 years ago would have marriage be made by the oldest woman in the family, deciding who her duaghter or son is..
| going to marry. I guess that's why I've added the different categories of love as an argument generally. Romantic love would lead to that specific form of marriage going into existentialism but there is definitely marriage that goes into rational thought or at least into a decision of marrying due to circumstances.
That's what's fun with people at the end of the day though. There are many different kinds of them.
| No problems if I can fuck them before.
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