This thread is permanently archived
[Radio] Radio Wire 20
| >The long dead line 141.70 comes back alive with 'Hold the line' by toto playing on increasing volume yet no host in sight
| "..--my ass I can tell you I-uh, I think that did it, we're live?" -N
>"We're live!"
| "too much asking for a first impression.. Hello once more ladies and--!" -N
"--more like 20th impression" -X
>"38th one actually!"
"Guys can we please--" -N
| "--Hello once more ladies, gentlemen and everythin' in between, you're now listenin' to-" -X
>" R a d i o W i r e ! "
"Now those of you who don't know what a Radio is please, PLEASE turn off your device, that's how we end up with minors showin' up to our events.. Now lucky for ya' humanity keeps advancin' so you're prolly hearin' us in yer' phone or computer or the frequency miiight've been caught by yer neurochip, not our fault!" -X
| "I was supposed to--" -N
"--Now today yer' bein' hosted by none other than Xii, none other than Big Neil and none other than California, who's legally a weapon" -X
>"You're a weapon"
>The background music lowers and finishes at this point
| "Now now I know it feels fun to take the big seat but remember who's the real star here--" -N
"--Try and touch my mic, go ahead do it, I see yer' hand comin' close, why don't you touch it and see what happens?" -X
"..Anyway we got news, right? I know I have the first half of those, let's hurry it before lines are open" -N
| "Rumors spark about the alleged White Knights alleged usage of alleged breast milk for the alleged advantages it offered in matters of training and such" -N
>"Allegedly, may I add"
"Allegedly of course, that's how you avoid a diffamation lawsuit, now I can't blame them, okay? I really can't, have you ever had breast milk? Cause le--" -N
"--Y-you had somethin' else right? Ya' were talkin' about this bar or somethin'.." -X
"Ah yes, the limelight!" -N
| "Now if you ever-hear me out, if you EVER find yourself stranded anywhere in the neon district you HAVE to look for the limelight karaoke bar, also some star on the name or something it's probably Japanese" -N
"...It's probably just a star?" -X
"Anyway you're gonna love this, why would Neil Michaels, anonymous alcoholic be recommending this one out of all bars out there in the city?" -N
"ah' wouldn't call you anonymous exactly there.." -X
| "Xii with all due respect you're being a real bitch right now, stop killing my vibe" -N
"N--"-X
"--Now what's special about this one? Well DUH I drank there, if you're lucky you might even sit on the very same seat I had on my last visit" -N
>"And with that--"
"--OH ALSO! Hold up I typed this on my phone while I was there.. There, the place is ran by no other than Mowa from StarFish Idol group of five! You get to visit the one bar blessed by not one but TWO local celebrities!" -N
| "Star.. What? Lemme see that-" -X
>"...Do you mean Nova from Star☆Wish! Idol group of five?"
"YES! Also how do you pronounce the star I- how do you even do that?" -N
| >A silence That balanced between awkward and fidsoointed rested for about 3 seconds
>"..And with that done with, Lines are open! Feels good to be back and feels even better to be welcomed in your devices, as always: call 555-XXXXXX to speak with 'Big' Neil Michaels, 545-XXXXXXX for a chat with Xii or 535-XXXXXX to talk with moi~"
| (and disappointed* oops)
| Long time no see!
| indeed! Couldn't wait to be back
| >Call on 555
| "Oh would you look at that! Who's the man who always gets the first calls?" -N
"I hope you slip on your way out today and break your neck when you fall" -X
>>890823
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Hello hello and welcome welcome to our first caller, I want to start this greeting with an apology for our absence, we were just out buying milk at the store. May I ask, who do we owe the pleasure?" -N
| >>890903
>A rough male voice answers.
"Yeah, about that 'buying milk' bizniz. You chummers the one selling them tiddy milk?"
| >Call on 545
| >>890967
"Sure why not, though for legal reasons you *have* to tell us the purpose of your buy sir, are you perhaps of some organization that requires it for certain purposes? breast milk ain't cheap you know?" -N
| >>890971
>Xii picks up line '545'
"Hello and welcome to the last pillar of free sp--Shit wait we've definitely used that intro before, er.. Fuck it, let's skip to the part where you tell me your name and we both pretend you ain't callin' here just cause the first line was taken, better for both of us" -X
| >>891066
"Nah, but you heard them WK boys using 'em? I wunna try to see if they *really* work, ya know?"
| >>891069
"Y-yeah hey! This is Maki! I'd like to thank you and show you some gratitude for setting your buddy straight!"
"Put some respect on Nova! And Star☆Wish too!"
| >>891112
"Alright let me level with you-"
>Neil breathed out a sigh heavier than O2
"I was counting on you being a White Knight yourself soliciting such delight and catching you in 85Db, this ain't a milking store this is a Radio, and for more that I'd love to keep pranking you you're creeping *me* out, something I didn't even though was possible" -N
| >>891185
"Why thank you for the appreciatin', I'll love to check out your bar one day, preferably a day that I know ah' won't be seein' this asshat's presence" -X
>A sigh from the first line gets picked up on this one
"though if he becomes a regular.. ya' either get used to the disrespect or do what every other bar has done and blacklist him" -X
| >>891221
"Aw, what? This is some bullshit, chummer! I ain't puttin' up with this shit no more!"
>He hangs up.
| >>891225
"Figured as much, remember this lesson everyone: Buy local. Don't go and call some delivery plataform for some breast milk, there's many local milfs in town you can simply ask for a cup, don't be shy about it" -N
>"Do not do this"
| >>891222
"We'd love to see you maybe next time you can talk about a star in the making!"
>There's what sounds like a struggle on the other end of the line.
"Hi Hiii~ This is Nova! Thanks for the shout-out! I'd just like to announce drink specials for anyone who mentions they heard about us on the Radio! 2 for 1!"
| >Call on 555
| >>891617
"Do you hear this y'all? This is what the establishment fears, local business supportin' each other, ya' wanna get plastered? Now ya' know there's a place out there who knows about quality-"
>A few taps cut the last word short by just so little
"-Now about the invitation I'll thank ya' and I'll take it, one of these days when I'm not locked in here ah' gotta go have somethin' there, you sound like good people" -X
| >>891660
>Neil picks up line '555'
"Good aftersometime sir or madam you are now connected to Radio Wire! If you wish to have a philosophical talk feel free to invite me over and bring munchies, if you wish to buy quite literally tons, trucks of breast milk press 2 like.. 5 or 6 times, surprise me" -N
| >>891881
"Those are some interesting assumptions, Neil."
>It's Red.
"I'll put it as a maybe for the philosophical talk. No for the breast milk though."
>He clears his throat.
"Anyway, we're calling because-"
>His voice is cut out by the sudden shout from a feminine voice that you might realize of as Alix's.
"WE'RE GETTING MARRIED!"
>She shouted excitedly.
"Yeah, that."
| >>891885
"W-why finally!" -N
>This statement came out with a tone that reeked of, for the lack of a stronger word: surprise
"I don't know why but I though you guys already were, must explain why you're both so lovey-gooey, you weren't a pair of weirdos just a young couple! I got to say you guys have my most sincere condolences on your engagement" -N
| >>892120
"I know right? Finally! It took him almost a decade, but he finally proposed!"
>Alix said excitedly.
| >>892205
"Honestly, if my father was still with us I'd be more than glad to send him your way just so you guys can have a dreamy Christian wedding"-N
"Wait- when did he die?" -R
"he's not dead stupid he just lives in NSF, though he wouldn't approve the whole 'living in sin' thing, you know, the whole thing about Red creampieing you on a daily bas--The fuck you want- no I'm NOT censoring myself, this is free speech!" -N
>That last part was accompanied by some background struggling
| >>892381
"This is why we should've called Cali instead."
>Alix says with an audible sigh.
"Yeah, Neil's not the kind of guy to announce a wedding to, is he."
>Red agrees, before clearing his throat and saying.
"Anyway, we're here to say that Xii and Cali's welcome to come to the wedding."
| >>892404
"Hey that's funny, you mentioned not one but TWO people that aren't me! I'm sure that's a blunder, a silly one at that, and that you will now say 'why of course you too Neil!' because- and let me tell you- because you don't hold grudges!" -N
>Each word came out faster than the last one, like a mustang accelerating downhill
"So what if I had an itty bitty slip about how creamingly messy your sex life is?" -N
"Second warning Neil" -R
"Uhm, hello? free speech??" -N
| >>892704
"Oh, there are children at the wedding, Neil. We know you don't like being around kids, so we thought you wouldn't want to come."
>Alix explains.
"Also because we're not sure you would be the best influence on the younger generations."
>Red adds.
"Fenrir would be very happy to see you though, I'm sure."
| >>892729
"..Yeah alright I'm happy with that explanation, you guys are alright, still alright with me" -N
"..Thanks for the invitations, we'll be more than happy to assist"
>Xii added politely after Neil's ego deflated enough for him to fit in the frequence
>"It'll be the first wedding I assist!"
| >>892918
"Great! We'll be happy to have you guys!"
>Alix said excitedly.
"Alright, we have some more preparations to make, so we'll see you there."
>Red continues, before the line cuts.
| "A pleasure like always, you see, everyone, this is what Radio was made for" -N
>The mic gets adjusted as the host's voice improves
"For you to create bonds, then share them to the world! Know the good ol' "it's none of your business"?, well thanks to Radio it can be! Make it everyone's business! And when you do, make sure it's with Radio Wire"-N
>He wrapped up with a click of the tongue
This thread is permanently archived
| >"RADIO WIRE, RE-RE-REESTABLISHING CONNECTION"
\
>"STATUS: CONNECTED"
\
>"NUMBERS"
>"555-XXXXXX MAIN LINE RAN BY NEIL"
>"545-XXXXXXX SECONDARY LINE RAN BY XII"
>"535-XXXXXX COMPLEMENTARY LINE RAN BY CALIFORNIA"
>"515-XXXXXX 'PRVT' BUSINESS LINE"
\
>"MUSIC, NEWS, EVENTS. 24/7"