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Lolicoin Update #3: "Upgrading the Blockchain" and other hilarity.
| However, having her around has led to some...interesting tales, which I thought I would tell here.
So two days ago, Lolicoin comes to me and tells me that she "upgraded her blockchain so that she can satisfy more customers". Now, for a Lilim that quite literally holds the blockchain within her body, what does that entail?
Well, apparently, "upgrades" needed to be made to the body.
Mfw you can see where I'm going with this, right /cyb/?
So she comes into my flat with HUGE TITS...
| And I'm not talking like, just standard Lilim breast implants, I'm talking she quite literally had melons the size of her head...and she could barely walk from them.
Turns out, what she did was implant literal car alternators into her breasts (one in each) in order to generate more electricity to allow her body to push more power to her blockchain without disrupting her operating system.
And please, don't let me tell you where she put the additional RAM...
| Anyway, so she's like, walking like she has a broken back, and her boobs start vibrating. And I mean, LOUD. Like, I could hear them from the othet side of the room loud. And she just starts shaking and shaking and shaking...until she passes out, and her OS begins throwing up Blue Eyes of Death in her retinas. Mfw now I need to take her to the hospital and try to explain why this tiny Lilim frame has two car alternators going off in her tits.
| So here I am, in the Downtown District Hospital, doing exactly that, when some guy comes into the place, a big doctor guy, with combed back hair straight out of a trideo, and he pulls me aside and says:
"So you've seen what...'implants' she has in her breasts, right?"
"Er...yeah, I know...car alternators."
Confused, the doctor looks at me with this "are you fuckin serious" glare and in all seriousness says:
"No, they're stuffed full of sex toys."
What?
"She told me they were..."
| So here I am, explaining to the hospital how I had no idea her breasts were stuffed full of >miniature vibrating pleasure machine engines.
She gets out, her breasts are reduced back down to normal size, and she says:
"I don't know about those alternators senpai, the kind old man who sold them to me may not have been so kind...I had hundreds! I was going to be the most powerful sentient cryptocurrency in Glitch City!"
| Hundreds.
Of car alternators.
So turns out she was buying them from "Electrics in the Bedroom", which she believed to be an electronics store, and that she asked for "something to empower her".
Guy gave her one of those, she saw their small size, and bought >the whole store's worth.
She stated her intention to fill her breasts with them. The guy blinked and told her he wasn't gonna charge her since "she was gonna get charged enough from this stuff"
The RAM was real at least...
| Don't ask me how she did it. I have honestly no idea. But she did. And it was...well, it was something. Anyway I'll take questions and reservation payments for anybody who wants to donate!-Nietzen
| oh my god -Maiden Heaven
| Now,
I usually try my absolute best to be a calm individual but just for this one case i will make an exception.
What in the ever living hell did i just read?!?!?!
>IA
| What the actual fuck...
| That's one heck of a story. But anyway, how much is her worth right now?
| Umm. I was NOT expecting that...
-NightWolf
| what -Dicktator
| Meh, I've seen more fucked up shit than this in other timelines but still tho.. WTF!?
-Arable
| Wait,and you still let her go outside after that?Sure,shes not gonna sell herself,but what if something like that happen again?The fuck!?
-Impulse
| Ohohohoho WAIT WAIT WAIT I think I saw your loli! She's not done selling herself. I don't think she ever stopped! I HAVE literally seen her go off with various sleazeballs in Neon!
Must have been before the boob implants though, girl was flat as a board. -Dicktator
| >>423031
Currently she's worth 10 Nuyen per Lolicoin.
>>423539
Honestly I doubt she'll do something like that again without telling me first, me and her had a long talking to.
>>423603
If it was before, she's stopped since then.-Nietzen
| >>423690 Arreee yooooouuu suuuuurrrre? I believed you, but I saw her again!
>A picture of a prepubescent looking, pale skinned lilim with red hair in a bob cut in a red and white dress is shown...propositioning an unknown man. Both have some very lascivious expressions and body language.
I mean seriously, you try to find Streaming-chan at ONE bar and this happens. What is her slut problem? -Dicktator
| >>423699 oh
She still sucks, just abort this crypto experiment and let that trapped girl go free -Dicktator
| Well that's enough random shit for today.
| >>423986 Dude, I'm trying, but like it or not, Lolicoin is her own identity now, and I can't just kill her to bring the other identity back. I have to find a way to separate them.
>Hello! ^_^
>I am Lolicoin! ^-^
>How is everyone doing today? ^.^
...you can still hijack my posts. HOW?!
>My secrets are safe with me~ ;>
...-Nietzen
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| Hey guys, Nietzen here. Lolicoin is actually not here at the moment, as I've finally convinced her not to "sell herself" every time she goes outside, which means she can be relatively trusted alone. I've been working on trying to discover how to recover the identity of the girl within LIC without having to destroy LIC's identity, but so far, no dice. Every attempt I've made to bring the old identity back is hit with a roadblock because I can't do it without removing LIC's coding.