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(AD) DATAMAX! Take your security To The Max!
| >The voice over continues,
"Do you lock your doors and secure your windows when you leave for work?" >A pause.
"Do your employers post corporate security guards at the entrances or front desk, for your protection and safety?"
"Do you entrust your valuables and income to high-end encryption and thick, armored wall?"
>The voice pauses again- the house changes to cartoon images of a bank, a school, a safety deposit, and even a restaurant with a cartoon bouncer in front of it.
| "Of course you do- it's just common sense! But what might surprise you is that for the average citizen of Glitch City, only the barest of needs are met."
>Soon, the images begin to transform- the suburban home has a broken door and broken windows- the bank is riddled with bullet holes. The restaurant is quite literally set aflame.
"We live in an increasingly insecure society, both local and galactic. And while we think that "just enough" for our everyday life, statistics show-"
| "-that we are always one step away from disaster. Indeed, incidents of credit fraud, home burglary, violent crime, identity theft, and other ills are up nearly 300% in the past three years alone, and shows no sign of stopping."
>The screen shows the buildings again, although this time they're in worse repair than before. The home and bank look like they'd been abandoned for years. The restaurant has been reduced to ashes.
| "Luckily, you don't need to accept this."
>With a comical "poof," all three buildings are instantly repaired... in fact, they may even look better than before. The house appears more shiny, the bank more high-tech. The restaurant has more people.
"Common sense says that if something's worth protecting, you'll do the best you can for your family, and for your livelihood."
>Panning shots of the camera entering and exiting the cartoon buildings, showing cartoon people seemingly-
| >Having the time of their lives- in the corners of the buildings are inconspicuous blinking lights attached to small buttons.
>Bunny ears appear behind a counter in the suburban home, before disappearing to be replaced by shots of people enjoying food in the fine dining restaurant.
"That's common sense to us, anyway. So if you have a choice in data security... why not take it to the max?"
>The buildings all zoom out. As they do so, the screen glitches slightly, with the buildings
| >glitching between their "destroyed" forms and their "pristine" ones erratically. The ad continues,
"Datamax. Take y͍̫o͖̺̫u̞̮̞̝̪͍̺͜r͖̥͕̜͞ ̜̮̙̞̖̦̲͢s̙̲͔̰̱͝e̜̙̫̹c̢u̸̹̬̼͉̺̬r͓̩͔̱i͜t̜̕y̴ , to the
M̴͓̫̦̩̜̈́͂̓̐̾̎ ̣͖̥̱́̂̈ͯ͛̚Ą͔̘̲̩̜̼̉̌̚ ͎̦̺͌̇ͩ͒̊̂ͅ ͇ͭͣ ̛̮̣̤͖͊ͫͩ́̓ ̲̱̮ ͎͎̳̮̥X̯͖̖́̌̓͜"
̼̻̀
| .̨.̤̻͓̩̟ͩͮ̽̚͝..̺̰̻̯̹̈ͭ̐̈́ͬ.̝͖̣͜.̦ͫͫ͌̆̾̓.̻͖.̀͐҉̗̠̩͔̖̞̩.̵̘͖͙̼̥̠̊ͩ́ͯ̎̆ͅ.̝̹̀̀ͮ̍͊͌ͯ
|
.̮͈̥.̗̜̙͓͎̱͋̽̆͐ͅ.̞͍̞̮͇͙͚.̠̹͇̐̂͂̄.̤̟̫̳̤̾̐ͬ͢.̤̞͔̣̹̀̌ͤ.̙.̭͎̳̻̤͌ͬ̐ͩ͊ͤ͡.̲͓̞̣̟͖H̲͎͂̑ͮ̇ͧȏ̠͔̞̦͎̤̙ͫͣ͂͐ͯ̿w ̼̾̽̽͢ͅč͔̺̞̮̖̒̌ͪͅu̔ͥͯͮͣ̉҉̘̻̠̠̬̼ͅt͙͎͍̯̫̓e̘̥̼̜͐́̄̅.̰̦̏͠ ̰̞̣̘̹̦̺͑̕
| >The screen flashes as a smol bunny doll with a pink dress and a ":3" face blinks onto the screen.
| OH GOD DAMN IT YOU ARE MAKING ME BURN THROUGH PHONES
| MY BRAIN, YOU FUCKER AAAAAAAAAAAA
Cute bunny though, so I forgive you
| >>159588
YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO USE A PHONE WHEN EVERY ONE YOU EVER HAD FELL DOWN IN THE FUCKING TOILET, I SWEAR, EACH GODDAMN TIME I GOT SUPER FUCKING FED UP
| He who defends everything, defends nothing.
Also, Merlin, stop.
| I ̡d͘͝íd̛͝ǹ'̵̀͜t͡ ͘͡d͘ǫ͡ ͢͞͡an͢͞y̷t͜h̷̛í̀ng̨̀ ̧t͞h̵o͢͟?͘
—̀͢M̨e̵͝r̵͟li̶͟͝ń
| Guys I know not everyone here is a hacker or in a similar trade by I feel it was obvious enough that this was done by Alice_rabbit given the avatar. -CN
| B A I T E D
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| >A tasteful chiming noise sounds on the databoard along with the appearance of a typical suburban home, with four windows, a door, two levels, and even a chimney stack!
>A voice over narration begins, a smooth, accentless male one with just a hint of enthusiasm, but careful enough to not sound too enthused. It'd almost be robotic in nature or a lilim that's trying too hard to sound like a text to speech generator... or maybe vice versa...
"Do you have a home or business?"